H.R.M. The Evil Queen/Mommy Dearest

hi. hi. hi. hi….two caramel macchiatos later and I’M WIRED!

gif-keyboard-16721414161592484685.gif How are you!? please take a moment to actually respond. Take a moment to look at yourself and be honest with that answer. How. Are. YOU?



Welcome back! (Or WELCOME TO THE NEWBIES!)

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So today I decided to make my mother cry. So for lack of boredom… mommy, this one goes out to you.


I always tend to take notice of my surroundings and do that one thing people shouldn’t do… compare. Now, most people don’t call their mothers The Evil Queen, yet I do. I know, I get weird looks and judged on it, but if you don’t take the time to ask “why?” then don’t pass judgment! It’s time to let the cat out of the bag… I admire The Evil Queen (not just my mom…you know the character from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs?)

I know, I know. You’re all thinking “WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?” well here’s the thing… do you really think a woman is going to kill her step-daughter because she’s prettier? (Imagine if this was an actual thing… 1 things for sure… I’d be long gone… JOKE) HELL NO!  Disney gives you 90 minutes of a story… a one sided story… now for those of us, that like to read, and research, and expand their horizon, there’s a lot more to her (thanks, Disney).gif-keyboard-18385355756049430498

The Evil Queen, just like Maleficent, or even Ursula, are actually quite complex characters that have their own stories. In Snow White, we see a villain, but what if the film was based on The Evil Queens perspective… would we see Snow White as the villain? something that’s 100% certain… The EQ (in her own movie) would not be a villain.

Now my mom.





Magic/Super Powers: For a lot of (pardon my french) ordure‘s out there my mom seems to be the villain. Well, let’s just get it straight. She’s not. Just like The Evil Queen, and something that I definitely inherit (and I’m very content about it) my mom has a very tactful way of picking and choosing what type of emotions she displays around people. It’s one of her many super powers, and it might sound a bit strange but it’s a method of defense.  You see, just like the Evil Queen, my mom has been hurt by people that have been/are very close to her, but she’s such a strong woman, and she’s been able to forgive and sometimes even forget, but some blows to the heart create walls, or in her case, defense mechanisms.

PLAN A/B/C…The Evil Queen never goes into a battle without a plan, and my mother ALWAYS has a plan. Not necessarily a battle plan per say, but in any scenario that is a bit above her control (we’ll circle back to this one), she goes in ready and with an exit strategy.


CONTROL! WOW. I’ve never been witness to a person that LOVES control more than my mother. Just give her three glasses of red and she’ll relinquish it, but FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS THIS WOMAN you can’t have control over EVERYTHING! Yet she tries. (Ask her about how she had to relinquish control over my hair when I showed up blonde to my house… I wished I had a picture of her face) The Evil Queen craves control like water, it’s in her nature, the one time she gave up said control, with her Huntsman, it bit her in the ass. At least my mom just gets a hangover.



My mother’s closet speaks for itself, and if anyone can rock a cape better than Dracula it will be EVRY.SINGLE.EVIL.QUEEN. Style is something that should stand on its own because my mother and all the queens get up on those heels and look as regal as ever.



Hearts… In Snow White, the EQ collects hearts as prices to manipulate its owner. The Evil Queen is said to have gained a lot of hearts from the villagers before Evil was added to her name, but the hearts were given freely.

154845_10150130781413916_577613915_7942929_4361473_n.jpgMy mom collects hearts as prices and takes care of them as if they were her own. She actually has one of the biggest hearts, resilient as hell, because god only knows all the crap this woman has been put through, but once you give her your heart and she gives you hers? You’re a goner. Your heart could not be in better hands.

Beautiful, Bold & Audacious… this one is self-explanatory. Need I say more?IMG_1248.JPG

And last but not least…

That happily ever after at the end. Just like every version of the Evil Queen I’ve read on and watched on television and films, and just like my mother, they are all wanting to be happy, to fit in in the world, and to surround themselves with love, acceptance, family, and happiness. At the end of the day, what’s more important than that?

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When you read this just take a moment (yes another one) to reflect on your mother, and how much of a bad ass she was/is/had to be. Some mothers are super heroes, others are Betty Crockers, others are Fierce leaders mine… mine is a queen… no… mine is The Queen and a good fucking one at that.

gif-keyboard-16455090837986382256.gif    I love you, mamma, thanks for teaching me how to stay Regal, and for allowing me to see the world from the villain’s side of things. One of the best things you taught me was not to see the world in black and white, adding color makes everything better.






Love you Pichin, ciao ciao.

– Yours… The heir to the Throne.

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