HIYA! I’m back, why are you?
So I have my three best friends, but this isn’t like Sex & the City, they like each other, they know each other, but we aren’t “a group of four friends,” which is interesting once I really think about it. I’m going to change their names, just like Carrie should have done in her column on the show, I wonder why Charlotte, Samantha, and Miranda never got mad at her — Sidenote. So we have my oldest friend, let’s call her Andrea (Ana) she’s much prettier (like a lot more) than Miranda, but she would be Miranda, we have Elena (Elettra) she’s such a mom like Charlotte, and we have Jen (Jessica) she’s like Carrie, but studying to be a lawyer and not live paycheck to paycheck like Carrie. Crap… did I just become Samantha? Moving on. We all went to Boston University and studied completely different things… like COMPLETELY, but I managed to get the best three people in this whole world to call me their Best Friend (that seems like a book title, should I Italicize?) Let’s start with Ana. (I totally gave up on the fake names, I’ll blame that on the ADHD and my lack of concentration)
Ana: For one, she’s the friend that you can’t get rid off, after almost 10 years, graduating together twice (High School & College), and after countless fights and arguments she still stuck around. If you know my personality (Evil Queen/Khloe Kardashian) you know that that is no easy task. The funniest part of this friendship is that I initially disliked her, she seemed like a goody two shoes and I was a bad bitch (no I wasn’t) so in my head, we just didn’t mix. She did the one thing that I hate the most, she proved me wrong. Long story short, we got stuck cooking together for HomeEc and she decided to put really hot oil under water (MORON) but the food was good so we passed. Just like that, I found a friend that became my sister, and her family became mine in a matter of minutes. It was like that spark you get when you meet someone that you’re going to be stuck with forever, that’s what it was for me with her and her family.
Fuck… I hope those sparks are not limited to one per lifetime… I still have a boyfriend to find.
Elettra: MOM! She was Ana’s friend in BU, but I stole her. We can also call Elettra — Ele, West Coast Buddy, Meatball, Lee (as my autocorrect likes to call her) or my favorite, Young Lana Parrilla , (because she is also half Italian & half Puerto Rican — her temper is horrible as you can tell) She also just found out I call her young Lana Parrilla. Ele is my like my “adult best friend” (we share recipes), she’s my confidant, the only one that will willingly listen to my tv show rants and actually be interested (or so it seems), and the one that truly believes I am capable of greatness. In this wild job search I am doing (Shameless Plug – I AM LOOKING TO BE A PRODUCTION ASSISTANT FOR ANY TELEVISION SHOWS OR MOVIES IN THE GREAT LOS ANGLES AREA)… back to Ele…she’s just like a mom, and whenever I achieve something she is the first one I tell, because aren’t we all seeking out mothers approval? She also comes with a sidekick, David, AND HE IS JUST LIKE HARRY (Charlotte’s husband) except he’s taller and has hair, but they love each other to bits and it’s FUCKING ADORABLE!
Jessica: or as we like to call each other “the best thing that came out of sorority life” (Hello Tri Delts.) When she burns someone you can actually use the phrase “You just got lawyered” and I love her even more for that (She’s in law school). She doesn’t put up with my bullshit AT ALL, and she WON’T LISTEN TO MY TV SHOW RANTS! (I just questioned our friendship) Sometimes it feels like we are soulmates (she might be the better half, but I’ll deny it until the very end) We share a lot of the same values, we act like petulant children when we are angry or don’t get what we want, and we would do just about anything to entrust the other one is happy. She’s the one I call when I am angry and need confirmation that I have the right to be angry, but she will not give me that confirmation all the time, which is infuriating, but isn’t that how you know if it’s a true friendship? On my Instagram posts (Shameless Plug – Vigiita) you might find her under Husband, King, or Ethel. Although I have to share her with her boyfriend Thor (that’s his actual name, like the Hamer Guy) she prefers me over him, right Jess!?
The Three of Them: the three things these girls have in common (apart from being the reason I am so awesome) is the way they get me through things, the way each individual personality, though being so different, is just as amazing as the other and the fact that if/when I get married I will stand alone at the altar because there is zero way I’ll be able to pick a Made of Honor. Unless either JLaw or Amy Schumer become part of my squad… then you all will be demoted to bridesmaid and it would make my life a bit easier. You know how people say college was the best years of their lives but don’t really give you direct reasons? well, I have three direct reasons Ana, Ele, & Jess. They are the three reasons why college was like no other experience, and you know how I don’t cry? Yeah… try leaving your best friends and not shedding a tear.
Okay, this might have been a way to sappy for my own good, but we are all scattered around Western Civilization so I miss them!
Right, so since I gave up their identities by giving you their names, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to show you their faces. So just like in the order on when they became my friends and how I wrote this post, I give you my three very best friends, My Three Amigas.
-Queen O (are we getting used to this sign off yet?)